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My first bona fide drabbles! I'm so proud!

Title: Laboring Under Different Assumptions
Summary:
Willow, Buffy, and Anya react differently to a certain situation. Takes place in my post-NFA verse in 2010-2011. 3 drabbles, 300 words.  Rated G.


“Do you need anything?” asked Buffy.

“Ooh, ice water!” said Anya. “Friends usually fetch that in movies.”

“Guys, it’s okay," said Oz.  "We can handle this." He unscrewed a thermos and poured a steaming, sweet-smelling liquid into the cup. Willow accepted it with a wan but happy smile and drank. After handing him back the cup, they interlaced fingers. She closed her eyes and breathed deeply.

Buffy and Anya leaned forward, wide-eyed.

A shudder rippled through Willow. Her breath hitched and then evened out.

“Was that a contraction?” whispered Buffy.

Willow and Oz were silent.

“This is boring,” said Anya.

* * *

“Buffy, are you okay? Is there anything-”

“I’m fine! I’m the slayer, I’m used to pain.” She doubled up momentarily and then stretched her trembling lips wide. “See? No big!”

Spike didn’t mention that her smile looked more like a grimace. All right, like bared teeth.

“The doctor can give you an epidural-”

“I’m fine. I’ve been stabbed, beaten, I’ve died. This is nothing compared to slaying.”

“Love, I think it’s different-”

“Willow was fine. She just did her meditation thingy and popped Danny out. I can meditate. This won’t ping on my pain thresh- aaarghhh-”

Ahhh, Buffy, my hand-”

* * *

“Why- isn’t- Xander- here- aah!”

“He’s on his way- traffic-”

Augh!”

“That’s it, everyone out!” The doctor ushered the Scoobies toward the door.

“But-” began Buffy.

“No buts!”

“Wait!”

All heads swiveled toward Anya, who propped herself up, panting. “Spike stays.”

“What?” said Buffy.

“What?” echoed Spike.

“I- hate- men- and I’m going to- aah- list all the ways I’ve tortured them- ungh- and Xander’s- not here and Spike- has a penis-”

Though it may have been the fluorescents, Spike seemed to pale. After a second Buffy prodded him forward.

Anya grabbed his hand and squeezed. “882: I- aah- disemboweled…”

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Comments

( 25 comments — Leave a comment )
slaymesoftly
May. 14th, 2011 06:13 pm (UTC)
ROFL These were great. Poor Spike. :)
gryfndor_godess
May. 14th, 2011 07:07 pm (UTC)
Thanks! They were fun to write. :D
adrienne88
May. 14th, 2011 07:17 pm (UTC)
These were so hilarious! I loved them!
gryfndor_godess
May. 14th, 2011 07:27 pm (UTC)
Thank you! I'm so glad. :)
snickfic
May. 14th, 2011 08:43 pm (UTC)
These are excellent. Especially the last one, which is the most excellent of all. OH ANYA, I ADORE THEE.
gryfndor_godess
May. 14th, 2011 08:50 pm (UTC)
Thank you! :D Oh Anya, when I think of thee, my heart expands, 'tis grown a bulge in it...
snickfic
May. 14th, 2011 08:51 pm (UTC)
She'd probably think it was a fine poem; I don't think poetic snobbery is one of her qualities.
gryfndor_godess
May. 14th, 2011 09:10 pm (UTC)
Agreed; she'd probably think it was very sweet and flattering. Well, modern Anya would (and she'd probably think the double entendre was hilarious). 1880 man-hating Anya probably would have been really confused and been like, "Your sexual innuendo amuses me and the rhythm is pleasant to my ear, but I won't respond to your flattery." Or else maybe she would have responded and popped his cherry because she probably didn't find many men she considered harmless enough to have sex with during that millennium of vengeance and so she'd seize the opportunity when it came.
moscow_watcher
May. 14th, 2011 10:57 pm (UTC)
Heee! ♥
gryfndor_godess
May. 15th, 2011 05:57 am (UTC)
:D Thanks for reading!
rahirah
May. 15th, 2011 03:34 am (UTC)
Hee! Love 'em!
gryfndor_godess
May. 15th, 2011 05:57 am (UTC)
Thank you! :)
ever_neutral
May. 15th, 2011 09:31 am (UTC)
LOL! Pure awesome.
gryfndor_godess
May. 15th, 2011 10:05 am (UTC)
Thanks! :D
lutamira
May. 16th, 2011 02:44 pm (UTC)
These are AWESOME! :D
gryfndor_godess
May. 16th, 2011 02:51 pm (UTC)
Thank you! :)
gabrielleabelle
May. 19th, 2011 02:19 am (UTC)
rofl!

I giggled. :)
gryfndor_godess
May. 19th, 2011 07:21 am (UTC)
:D Thanks for reading!
rebcake
Jun. 6th, 2011 05:33 am (UTC)
Hee! Love them! It's so true that every woman and every labor is a different experience. This seems right for each of them. Spike draws the short straw. (Wonder if Xander was "caught in traffic" for a reason?)
gryfndor_godess
Jun. 6th, 2011 12:56 pm (UTC)
:D Thank you! I'm so glad it feels right for each woman. (Actually, Xander's caught in traffic because he was in LA assessing construction damages on Angel's office after a demon attack, so he, Angel, and Cordy are frantically on their way to Sunnydale and you can imagine how unhappy Xander and Angel are to be stuck together, and possibly I think about my verse way too much).
zanthinegirl
Nov. 16th, 2011 04:17 am (UTC)
Hee! these are all fun, but number three is awesome. So much Anya love!
gryfndor_godess
Nov. 17th, 2011 04:28 am (UTC)
:D Anya is such a fantastic character. I love writing her. Thank you!
jennacide333
Dec. 12th, 2012 07:47 am (UTC)
Lmfoa yes yes spike has a penis
gryfndor_godess
Dec. 15th, 2012 05:02 pm (UTC)
*g* Poor guy's really in for it.
jennacide333
Dec. 15th, 2012 06:43 pm (UTC)
Lol
( 25 comments — Leave a comment )

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